Assignment 6c: How to Get Over the Harry Potter Series.

It was your childhood. You devoted so much time to waiting for the next installment, whether that is a book or film. You really can’t believe that it’s over.

But I am sorry to say that it is.

It will be a difficult process, but you have to persevere. Here is how to get over Harry Potter.

How to Get Over the Harry Potter Series

1. You need to realize that there aren’t going to be any more books. There is little to no chance that JK Rowling is going to write anything else in the Hogwarts Universe, nor should she have to. She’s spent a large portion of her life dedicating herself and her life to Harry Potter and his adventures. And sure, you’ll always have the seven books, but nothing will ever really compare to the delicious suspense of cracking open a new installment and being wowed by all the twists, turns and Tonks quips.

Can look like anyone who has ever existed, chooses to be herself, but with pink hair.

2. Get everything out of your system. Re-read the novels and re-watch the films. You practically have them memorized by now, but it will be fun all the same. That is, until it isn’t fun anymore. Watch it until your eyes almost bleed with annoyance. Watch it until you can recite the dialogue backwards. Watch it until you can no longer keep your eyes open and you’re reenacting the scene from “A Clockwork Orange.”

Yer a Wizerd, Harry.

3. Find details in the text you never noticed before. Man, Harry is sassier than you remember him being. Wow, in the last film, Snape deflects McGonagall’s attack INTO the other Death Eaters, how did you not see that before? You will notice them everywhere, in both the films and the novels. You will begin to love characters you barely noticed before since they have such rich back stories that aren’t in the primary text, and they all have origin stories, you just have to look for them. Go on, Look up Blaise Zabini. That throw-away line about his mother is interesting, isn’t it?

It’s a little sad that Harry Potter is never anyone’s favourite character in his own series.

4. Become completely immersed in the fandom. Befriend your fellow Hogwarts house mates- you are such a Gryffindor! There are some great places where you can congregate to socialize with fellow Potter-heads (on the internet, actually leaving the house is for posers).  If you don’t feel like human interaction, then play one of the many Harry Potter video games (lego or otherwise, up to you). Read all the interviews that JK Rowling did during press junkets and all the cast interviews from promoting the films. Did you know that the Tonks/Lupin relationship began because JK Rowling read on a post from a fan forum that someone wanted to see Tonks have little ‘multicoloured were-pups,” or that Lupins lycanthropy was a metaphor for HIV patients? No? Well, after this step you most certainly will.

This man slept in a childs bed for YEARS in the form of a rat. Years.

5. Fanfiction. Wow. There is a lot of Harry Potter fanfiction for each generation. There’s fanfiction centered around the Hogwarts founders, Dumbledore and Grindelwald, the Marauders era, The Golden Trio and even the next generation of the Golden Trio’s kids. It is entirely possible that there is enough fanfiction to last you forever. There is even a musical play based off the series that was so popular that it catapulted Darren Criss into Glee. Not to forget the Wizard Rock bands that make songs about the Wizarding world. There is also a puppet series with tunes so catchy, everyone has seen them. All of these things can be watched for free on Youtube.

6. Pottermore Pottermore Pottermore. You should totally go on Pottermore! You get to relive the experience of reading the books the first time but interactive this time. You walk through Diagon Alley and Hogwarts, following Harry on his adventure. You can get your own personalized wand and pet owl! YOU CAN EVEN BE SORTED INTO A HOUSE BY THE SORTING HA- wait, what do you mean you’re in Slytherin? That makes no sense, YOU ARE A LION! Roar as loudly as you can until the Sorting Hat submits to your request (although, come on, we all know that the sorting hat lets you choose your own house because at the end of the day, choice is a factor in the sorting, like Harry’s decision to be put into Gryffindor rather than Slytherin in the first novel).

SHUT UP HAT— YOU DON’T KNOW MY LIFE!

7. You don’t. Hope that one day some television company will be smart enough to option the books and make them into a television show. Why not? How many books have been made into tv shows? Dexter, True Blood, Game of Thrones, Gossip Girl, Friday Night Lights?! Why NOT Harry Potter? It has enough material to last endlessly and you can even bring back some of the cast from the movies to play the adult characters as a nod to the greatness of the films. So what if the books already have films based after them? You know what other series has both movies and television shows based after it? Sherlock Holmes. Name one recent adaptations of that series that has flopped.

Checkmate, sucker.

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.

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Congratulations! Now that you have so completely and totally immersed yourself into the Harry Potter world, you will never leave. You will sweat and bleed magic and nothing anyone does will ever be able to make you leave. Don’t forget, you might have children one day, and your Harry Potter books will be waiting.

It literally has ‘more’ in its name.

Master has given Dobby a sock! Dobby is free!

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3 comments on “Assignment 6c: How to Get Over the Harry Potter Series.

  1. ridabook says:

    I’ll never get over it. I will love it forever. Fanfics for life. ; A ;
    Also, Harry was totally my favourite character.

  2. […] Assignment 6a: How to Get Over the Harry Potter Series. (caffy91.wordpress.com) […]

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